NOTE: I initially drafted this piece in 1996 when my basset
Hermia was a puppy. The ninth anniversary of her trip to the Rainbow Bridge
occurs soon, so I decided to pull out the essay and polish it up.
In the late 1960’s when I was about 12 years old, my parents
sent my younger sister and me to Charm School at Sears (before it moved to the
mall). At that time in the South—I grew up in Baton Rouge—it was important for
young girls to learn how to comport themselves properly in order to prepare
them for the marriage market, that is catch a husband.
We learned to walk like ladies, stand like ladies, sit like
ladies, groom ourselves likes ladies, and other such pertinent “strategies” to
make ourselves attractive to potential husbands. At the end of this training,
we had a graduation of sorts, a fashion show where we got to model an outfit of
our choice from Sears. In addition, we could purchase at a discount one outfit
of our choice, whether we modeled it or not.
I have always loved pajamas. To my parents’ dismay, I
decided I wanted to model pajamas. I had chosen a pink nylon sleeveless
knee-length nightie with a matching robe. My parents and the Charm School Instructor
begged and pleaded with me to model street clothes. My parents assured me that
they would buy me the pajamas with the Sears discount. I was unmoved and
modelled the pajamas. To my parents’ credit, they did not pull rank and force
me to model street clothes, but let me have my own way. They even bought me the
pajamas!
I remembered this episode when I enrolled the
eight-month-old Hermia in an obedience school—fortunately not at Sears!--which
I referred to as “Puppy Charm School.” (By the way, obedience school
instructors wince when they find a basset hound in their class. Bassets are not
stupid but stubborn. Even with the reward of food, bassets are loathe to do
something they don’t really want to do.) The doggy pupils practiced tasks such
as sitting, staying, heeling, and coming when called in order to make them
better citizens of the human world, just as my sister and I learned to walk,
stand, sit, and groom ourselves like ladies to a different end.
The last session of Puppy Charm School consisted of a
“graduation,” similar to our graduation from Sears Charm School. As the canines
went through their paces for their admiring humans, I imagined my Hermia sitting,
staying, heeling, and coming when called while wearing pink pajamas!
LAGNIAPPE: My husband, who is also my editor, would say that
I am as stubborn as a basset, which I will take as a compliment, even though he
did not intend it that way! :-)
